Pain free opioid withdrawals!!! At last... Trust me everyone, you might want to read this... Finding the The Missing Ingredient! Or traditionally it would have been “Eureka!” Even so, I wont be running naked through the city streets whilst proclaiming so... uhm... again... ever... there was Tequila involved, need I say more? So without getting into to much sad sob story blah blah blah detail, I have been shot, stabbed and burnt (literally), I was also struck by lightning (no seriously I am not kidding), SAD ENOUGH FOR YOU?! I could go on and on about events that paved the road to addiction, but ultimately I was the one who walked the road... I am a recovering opioid addict. But without ego, also a blessedly so, very smart man and a psychological researcher amongst a great list of other things. Thank God for an acute fear of needles, I never mainlined! No less of a bloody mess though. We don’t do it because we like it, we do it because we are addicted to it, which means gut wrenching, 9th circle of hell on steroids, withdrawals, once you run dry! If they lasted a day or two like portrayed in most of the popular drug culture cult films like Trainspotting, there wouldn’t really be that much of a problem, the thing is, they don’t, they can last for about up to 7 months for up to a year!!! Try functioning normally whilst your body is physically shutting down and going into shock and then tell me to get over it again you ... mph never-mind... it is not a fun experience in the least, let me assure you... and medical professionals will not admit this following little fact to you... going cold turkey can do more damage than just stying on the drugs initially, because most medical professionals have not gone through the process they do not pick up the strain on the heart and nervous system, leading to heart failure, insomnia, dementia and a whole long list of other side effects and fatalities in the longer scheme of things... you need to do this slowly and do it properly, removing ALL the opioid residue from even as far inside your body, as your bone structure. Even so I had reached a point of maturity in my life where dependence has simply become an overwhelming childish burden to bare, so I did what any uninformed stupid addict would do, I tried to stay home and abstain from using... hahaha! Yeah, it did not work. I always knew traditional clinics was out for me as I have a major problem with any sort or form of authority other than the Almighty that Is, Was, and Will ever be, so rehab, in the traditional sense, was a no no... leading to rookie mistake number 2, SUBOXONE\METHADONE! Long and somewhat strange story short, after a 6 month Suboxone binge, I tapered back down to heroin... Then I decided it was time to fight fire with fire, traditionally a lot more suited for my personality type, and so in comes the first crucial peace of the puzzle, only mine came at the highest of costs... so busy doing some research on the net I stumble upon magic ingredient no. 1) Ibogaine. Now unfortunately some greedy asshole government’s around the world simply can not allow to loose the income from illegal drugs, predominantly Heroine and Cocaine, think about it, from production to policing to selling to shipping, it makes Amazon look like kindergarten! So to make things like Ibogaine ridiculously expensive and/or illegal, a lot of pockets belonging to very shady figures remain safe if you know what I mean. It is an unfortunate sad fact, but a reality none the less. So just a little about Ibogaine... just a must first step in dealing with your habit on the inner and outer most, practical psychological level you can find, it is rough stuff to say the least. So what is the problem? For short term users generally I would say, nothing. But for those of us who have reached the 10 year mark, things tend to get a lot nastier a lot lot quicker! By the first morning the effects of the Ibogaine wares out (waiting for you to finally fall asleep, but don’t let me ruin the surprise for you) you are going to start praying, especially if you happen to be an atheist, that death will come soon and quick. I have seen child birth... I’ll drop ten babies before going through one hour of peak withdrawals hands down, any day, I shit you not!!! Oh yes, you remember I mentioned paying a harsh price for knowledge gained... this one will twist your sense of self and make you go just a little queasy in the pit of your stomach, anyone who has taken Ibogaine will completely understand... So I show up to the Ibogaine clinic... they do all their introductions and explanations and see us comfortably to our rooms, they give us the full dose and let me tell you this girl had some potent shit! I vomited and right afterwards wham! Fairy land in the most literal sense of the word! Beautiful!!! Strong audio visual inputs like you would not believe going on all around me! So as I am just really “getting to the beautiful part of the visualisations”, the door opens, the owner comes in and sits me down on the bed and tells me “ darling your Father just passed away...” we were very close, flew together built aircraft together, drove our bikes together... There are no words that I could tell you to fully make you appreciate what was happening inside of me, how much more broken can something already shattered be? Now imagine dealing with Doctors, Lawyers, funeral homes, family I never even knew existed and the kicker... guess who the strong person in the family is! The one everyone always runs to, to keep things together.. you got it, the guy in mirror I face every morning! The biggest screw up of all... FACING ALL THIS ON A HEAD FULL OF IBOGAINE!!! The other strong person usually is my Mum, but since it just so happens to have been her birthday... 1st of June, I wasn’t expecting to much from her... I mean how do you even say happy birthday to someone when they just lost their husband? For fuck sake, what are the odds?!?!?! Then did I mention that Ibogaine should never ever EVER be taken with Heroine, YOU DIE! Guess where I stopped right after getting that piece of news on a full dose of Ibogaine... my dealer... by all means I should be dead!!! But that is not a first, actually literally the 6th time I simply should not have made it, this the only incident being drug related!!! So it is safe to say that if there is a Guinness World Record for the amount of time it took to go into full blown relapse, I think I should at least be a serious contender!!! Also taking all things into consideration, so should I be for the number of near godamn death experiences, experienced by a human being!!! Actually having died twice... the best experiences of my life... so far, ironically! Ok, so a year passes before my second attempt... it did not go very well either (big surprise right?), although the place I went in the Magalies is probably the best you could get anywhere, the staff is top notch, the Ibogaine was beautiful, but just not enough to get through that point where the lymphatic and nervous system can hit it’s reset saturation point. So by month two of non stop withdrawals, my Mum begs me to start again just to see me on my feet! But the second time round was by no means a waste, as it brought me to a wallop load more knowledge, this time the prise was not high at all, at a two for one sale in fact, I figure Karma felt it owed me a little something after the whole “your Dad (and best friend) is dead enjoy the Ibogaine” horror! So magic ingredient no. 2) DMT - Smokable form Changa. Very important to help kick start the old noggin into producing it’s own receptors in the dopamine range... and for overall sense of spiritual awakening like there is no other... but that is a whole different story all together... So at that point in time as you can imagine, things were a little rough to say the least. But it so happens that the person who originally introduced me to the DMT (God bless you Ash, also a person who happened to be there for treatment), who also introduced me to his supplier, who also happened to have different growers of medical grade Marijuana! People this is an absolute must have!!! I can not emphasise its help in the whole sobriety from opioids process enough, so much so, that I have become a grower myself!!! So safe to say that magic ingredient no. 3) Medical Marijuana, is the über magic ingredient, yes it is very expensive, at 2G’s a plastic bank note baggy (R200/1g), how much do you spend on opioids???!!! And trust me, it is not the stuff you pick up from the local taxi rank... like lightyears in between!!! Ok, so far I have been blessed with three of mother natures own beautiful remedies, and strong ones at that! In fact the strongest I believe known to mankind... so far... yet, OPIOIDS is a bitch with teeth... with babies who in turn have little teeth of their own... and so, the cycle gets going!!! Because lets face it, it is also a beautiful substance offered by mother nature, but it has it’s time and place like all things in this part of our space time existential continuum light encoded program... oh never mind I am getting way ahead and into the unnecessary again... old habits really do die hard... point and case... NOT ENOUGH YET!!! Something was still amiss and I do not tend to miss to many things in this amazing multiverse!? Say that seven times fast... got you didn’t I? So basically it was all the way back to the drawing board... a place I do not like to be and never for longer than is absolutely necessary. I got my use down to round about a constant 5-7 bags a day, but that was it, any less would result in me going horizontal and remaining that way till the flow gets going or gets cut of all together... resulting in me remaining horizontal for the better part of a year before you can expect as much as a good morning gesture, let alone a reply, from me... Obviously this was a problem where something was going to have to give... and give big time! Now I am not a very suicidally inclined type, but dear Lord a man can only take so much right! So yeah the thought crossed my mind several times, if only for the thought of all the wasted potential and standing in front of my Creator without any real excuse has always been one thought to much for even me to bare... so that was a no no... Then, as these things tend to happen, out of the blue, one of the girls who often writes to me for life advise or a good chat or whatever... support... happens to mention Mitragaia... and immediately little sparks of magic octarine flare up in the deep corners of my ever so hungry inquisitive nature... and just like that a big piece of the puzzle falls into place!!! KRATOM!!! Now I have to be honest, I was the very personification of scepticism at this point, could anyone say that they would not have been if they were in my shoes? I mean I have tried just about everything short of a shotgun to head, step on the broomstick, tried and trusted method, at this point, so then what could I possibly have to lose except a few more pieces of paper with some overrated dead politicians face printed on it any ways... But make no mistake, I did a shit load of research beforehand as those still unfamiliar will quickly learn, Kratom has a very, very big family of individuals, each adding its own unique set of characteristics to the mix. So you are going to have to stretch the old grey matter and read up on each that will enhance the flavours of your life, for your specific needs... So I initially got some for me, for helping me get through these awful withdrawals, also, for my mum, suffering from chronic pain in back, extreme depression, anxiety, she is also a junky in her own socially acceptable way, she is on barbiturates, for a very long time now and also consumes codeine like a toddler snacks on smarties. The order took about two to three days and it was on my doorstep. Packaged, all pretty, and ready for consumption... me still as sceptical as could be. I took four red Bali Kratom and two white Maeng Da Kratom tablets just to see what it does just a little after waking up, I did take one bag of heroin with a joint just after waking, not knowing what to expect from the Kratom, I gave my mum two green Papau Kratom tablets and waited... and waited... and after about 8 - 9 hours of waiting, the realisation hit me like a ton of bricks, that was it... no withdrawals!? Where I would be at a point of serious discomfort by then, or smoked at least 3 bags... it was truly unbelievable... so checking up on my mum, 10 hours in, no Codeine, no pain, no barbiturates (and is slowly weening down after 30 years of abuse), stress gone, we both had a pick up since my Fathers unexpected departure (get it? He was a pilot... come on this is comedy gold... he would have laughed). All this just seemed a bit strange after my many years of abuse I thought I would have grown just about immune to every possible remedy there is! I had my second joint about 12 hours in, my Mum went to bed taking her first barbiturate for the day just to help go to sleep... instead of stuffing them down her throat 2 at a time 10 times a day, she still has the same packet of Codeine tablets lying by her bed she purchased the day before, where they would usually be long gone... Basically it was a complete game changer as I was told by a... reliable source... hehe... I told myself if this stuff could just help me cut back a little... it would be worth it, it totally cut it out, completely surpassing all expectations I could have had to the point of me being totally flabbergasted as to how not more people know of this!? I can go traveling now... do people even understand something that simple is so severely suppressed because of addiction!? Seriously if after reading this, if you are still sceptical, in any way, well then you are retarded and should definitely get that looked into... sorry, but come on... sometimes so very very seldom unfortunately, when something sounds to good to be true, it’s actually better!!! Now it is at this point where I must pause for a second and truly bring everyone’s attention to this sad little fact... this experience of trial and error, ups and downs has been very, very, very costly! Most people will simply not have access to these miraculous things that is supposed to be much more freely available... people we can all do our part, to begin with, don’t look down on someone with a dependence you simply do not know how they came to be there. Also a very big lesson, do not make this mistake... there is a big difference between sympathy and empathy... the difference is I have a complete lack of the first!!! The old “Rekkie” S. A. Special Forces (Respect) had a saying in their camp that said: “Jou ma bly nie hier nie!” Usually followed almost expectedly with a “P” word which I don’t think needs much elaboration for anyone familiar with Afrikaans people... Translating to “Your mother does not live here!” In other words don’t expect any sympathy from me! PERIOD! But I have a never ending ocean of empathy... You see, the one thing I found that made my addiction worse than the addiction itself, was the constant mess of trying to cover up my addiction! So why cover it up? Because especially when we are young we are easily stigmatised as being “that type” when the assholes who brought up “that type” does not even know what exactly “that type” means! So to all the youths out there, don’t get boxed in! Talk! Talk! Talk! Otherwise no one will ever know... “I am in pain”, “help me”, very easy words to think, but its not so easy to say them, I know, but please do guys, we are not mind readers in that sense of the word. We can not make the hurt stop, until you tell us where it hurts... and trust me, I have had my share, I understand... you are not alone... So without trying to compete with the Bible for word count, I will follow up in time with a precise procedure for kicking the scag for once and all, including how and when and how much with concern to these four beautiful magic ingredients... Thank you all the Powers that be for Kratom and thank you everyone who supported and believed when I gave them no reason to do so...